Jake Gyllenhaal Dating Reese Witherspoon!

MSNBC reports that the two people seemingly unhappy with the celebrity pairing of Reese Witherspoon and Jake Gyllenhaal are Kirsten Dunst and Jake’s mom, Naomi Foner. Naomi thinks Jake is biting off more than he can chew as Reese comes with baggage in the form of two kids. Meanwhile, Kirsten isn’t pleased because she thought she’d always get back together with Jake. A source says that knowing Reese and Jake are close to being engaged is like a knife in the heart for Kirsten and According to Star, Kirsten’s been caught crying in public twice recently, and Jake and Reese are the reason! “Seeing photos of him out with her kids is just too much to handle,” Kirsten’s pal told the magazine.

I can just imagine Kirsten sitting alone on a park bench fine one minute and bawling her eyes out the next. Should I be laughing this hard? I don’t know. I feel bad. Kind of. Not really. Alright, alright. Not at all. If I was sitting next to Kirsten on that park bench, I might literally die from laughter. At the very least, my finger would be all tired from having to point at her just in case people were confused as to who and what I was hee-hawing at.